Growing up, I never liked the fall. To me, it was cold and wet, and served as a barrier between me and my favorite holiday: Christmas. I also wasn’t super into Lord of the Rings. I had read The Hobbit and enjoyed it well enough. I even remember watching the 1977 cartoon Hobbit movie and liking it enough to watch it a few times. However, I did not love The Fall or Lord of the Rings, but I do now.

What changed? The love of my life loves these things, and now I love them too. But this is not me changing my tastes or who I am as a person in order to appear to have more in common with my husband. There are plenty of things he enjoys that I do not. Mountain biking is the first thing that comes to mind. But I love The Fall and Lord of the Rings because I see how much enjoyment he gets from them. I love how his eyes light up, and he smiles with delight when the leaves start to change color. When we decorate the house in rusty pickup trucks laden with pumpkins, and various woodland creatures, I have to admit it takes on a much homier feeling. And I have learned to appreciate the simple pleasures of the cozy sweaters, tea, and pumpkin spice that fall brings.

I started loving the fall after getting married, but I began loving Lord of the Rings while my husband and I were dating. That’s when the The Lord of the Rings movies first came out. We would dress in costumes (that I made) and attend the midnight showing. I loved watching him become enthralled as he watched his favorite childhood stories come to life on the screen. Seeing him so full of joy, I couldn’t help but be filled with joy myself. This love continued to grow as more movies and spin-off series were produced and we watched them all together. My love culminated in a surprise, Lord of the Rings-themed, 40th birthday party for my husband. I planned it for over a year and turned our entire backyard into a Lord of the Rings Utopia. I will remember the look on his face for the rest of my life, and my smile was just as big as his.

There is delight in sharing joy. When we begin to love the things our loved ones love, it is not us changing who we are, nor is it a reflection of bandwagoning. Instead, it is a reaction to the deep connections we feel for those individuals. Finding joy in the passions and interests of those we care about allows us to grow in understanding, strengthens our connections, and creates shared experiences that tie our lives together. Ultimately, by celebrating what brings happiness to those we love, we not only enhance our relationships but also discover new joys in our lives. So go ahead and love the things your loved ones love.